BLOWiNGiT, Author at Blowing It

September 8, 2018July 2, 2019

Why Not Attitude (Blowing It Scenario #146).

Decisions Made In The Absence Of A Why.

If I asked you why you would do something, maybe I gave you an irresponsible choice. And you responded with, “why not?” It would be a somewhat aggressive stance to take against finding your why.

One of the ways it’s the right choice is if you are potentially looking to find your why and asking yourself why not. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Scan your mind to find the answer why not to do some. In doing so you are separating the two, why, and not. First find the why, and if it leads you to a not, you will have the information needed to steer clear of any given task. But start with why, simply ending at why not is hardly an answer. Why not, can tend to be a diminishing stance that works on the negative, a diminutive argument that avoids the positive growth question of why. If you’re committing damaging acts all around you as well as within you, to your mind, body, spirit and to property as well as those around you and your carefree answer to it all is why not. You are aimless in your pursuits, not only aimless you are destructive. Like a driver asleep behind the wheel. It’s only a matter of time before you crash. Better hope that when you do, you don’t take anyone else down with you. Or better yet just wake up and start going the right direction.

There is only one positive side to why not, and that is if there are so many whys that you simply cannot find a reason not to. A friend ask to travel the world with them, your answer may be, “absolutely, why not.” In your heart you know the positives out way the negative but an answer may arise that leads you to why you cannot go. Possibly don’t have the finances for it, or don’t have the time for it. This is an example of you actively looking for a reason not to do something in this case you are operating in full use of the why not question to find your not. But if you find there’s a strong enough why, you will move heaven and earth just to get to it.

If you haven’t noticed yet I used over twenty whys in this article. That was by design, use the word often, allow it to be a guide, avoid its avoidance, Follow your why and you and the world around you will beat a path to straight to it.

Thank you very much for taking the time to read our post. If you like what you read, or even if you don’t, we would love to hear from you. Please join our email list here. Or if you want to comment on this article, or write your own in our Forum. Please sign in here and if you are new to the site you can register here. This website is not intended to be a blog. We want it to be a place to help others grow and learn from mistakes and the Forum is where that begins. Please tell us your stories.

September 8, 2018July 2, 2019

Undervaluing Ourselves (Blowing It Scenario #145).

It’s High Time We All Come Together And Each And Everyone One Of Us Find Our True Worth And Charge The Correct Value Of That Worth.

Two articles came out this week that brought about just how disconnected we are with our proper value of our work. One of which was about the gig economy and it’s race to zero. How everyone around the world who uses the internet to sell their professional skills and services, skills most acquired through many years of hard work and dedication. All these freelancers and entrepreneurs are all now in a race to the bottom, speeding steadily toward giving away all their hard work for free. When we don’t control the paradigm the value is skewed. There is a story I once heard that Picasso was sitting at a café sketching on a cheap napkin when a lady witnessed he crumpled the napkin and shoved it into his pocket she than asked if she could have it. He replied, “Absolutely you can have it, for $20,000 dollars.” She says back to him, “but it only took you a few seconds to create.” His final response to the women is a telling symbol of knowing your value. He tells her, “No this took me a lifetime to create.” This is a one of the biggest lesson we can ever take about our value. We put so much hard work and effort into being able to create that work of art, some put their bodies through so much, why diminish its value?

Value is not only tied to the moment we create something new, that is simply the event. Most people don’t see the work that goes into creating, the education and learning of the process, the practice, and the many failures. All most people see is the final results and that is just the tip of the iceberg. When we get to a point of such mastery, we should not simply be relegated to charging five dollars for that work on a website that in turn takes 20 percent profits on your effort. We should only charge five dollars if we are complete novices and are using it as practice to get better. We should be creating our own domain where we control the paradigm. Where the perceived value we create is translated into intrinsic value to others. And when we all pay the correct price we all rise the tide together.

The second article that came out was about one of the best NFL running backs in the game holding out for a better long term contract from the team. He wants to protect is body for a better long term deal. And he should do that. Currently his company is putting a high short term price tag on him and trying to squeeze very last drop out of him before they release him and that is not fair. So he has exercised his right to put a higher value and in his eyes investing in his future is more important than the short term. This is a man who knows his value and is not backing down from it. Take a lesson from this. A great player on defense recently did this and another team saw his value and paid him his worth. The running backs team is controlling his paradigm and not allowing him to shop his skills on the open market and this lack of control is hurtful to true value. Just know your worth and except nothing less even if it requires you lose in the short term. Just be cognizant of the fact that others won’t always see that same value.

September 5, 2018July 2, 2019

Sleep Depravity (Blowing It Scenario #144).

Is This A Dream? Are We All Walking Through Life Half Awake Half Asleep? When We Have Too Much Going On In Life, Sleep Becomes The First Casualty.

As I write this my eyes burn from lack of sleep but not for a lack of effort. The days sometimes get busy and if you’re not careful they can tend to slip away from you. It’s 5 a.m. and if I don’t fall asleep by 8:30 p.m. I can kiss those eight hours goodbye. We often don’t take into account that we’re restless and awake at least one hour throughout the night. So we can’t, say, go to bed at 9, and wake at 5 and assume that we got our necessary sleep requirements. Who has the ability get to bed at these hours anyway?

Most of us have job and other work throughout the day, consider that at least 10 hours out of your day is spent at a job, with commute and lunch break it’s a reasonable assumption, maybe a little less time, maybe a little more, give or take. That leaves you with about 5 waking hours left to yourself and other curricular activities. Not taking into account dinner which can take hours, and if you have kids and they have activities, your time, that measly 5 hours, is now there’s. Maybe you want a little time with your significant other every night those hours add up too. Or if you’re working on building something like a side business or you have a hobby more hours. Maybe you want to get to the gym, the drive there and back adds up, along with the workout itself. Where do you find the time for that? It usually comes at the sacrifice of sleep, long after the children are asleep and the work is complete. So when you want to try to cut out a tiny sliver of time for yourself, you either have none or you’re relegated to slashing those extremely important, highly necessary sleep hours. To add to all this we have our technology that is a constant hindrance not only to our attention but also to our sleep, blasting us all day and into the evening, with alert inducing blue light beams. Light that never fully allows us to produce the much needed melatonin and serotonin necessary to fall asleep.

I have a friend who practically is sleepwalking through life. With a full time job, a wife and three kids who are very active in sports and school, he scarcely has any time to sleep let alone time for himself. Yet this is an incredibly common story in our society. We do not prioritize sleep enough anymore. But we certainly need to start.

Set bed times for everyone in your house hold. Disconnect from technology. Block out distracting light or noise. Have an evening routine that helps you wind down. Do the routine and go to sleep at the same time every evening. Keep the temperature in your room around 65 degrees. Keep the same wake time and if it changes, change up your evening routine as well to accommodate. Use natural aids in only essential situations don’t abuse any sleep remedies. Your body will do it naturally if you just train it too. With enough sleep you’re less irritable, happier, more alert, and more pleasant to be around. So whatever it takes we should get more sleep, we will all be better for it.

Thank you very much for taking the time to read our post. If you like what you read, or even if you don’t, we would love to hear from you. Please join our email list here. Or if you want to comment on this article, or write your own in our Forum. Please sign in here and if you are new to the site you can register here. This website is not intended to be a blog. We want it to be a place to help others grow and learn from mistakes and the Forum is where that begins. Please tell us your stories.

September 4, 2018July 2, 2019

Apologizing Because Of Backlash (Blowing It Scenario #143).

We All Know You Don’t Mean It. It’s A Forced Apology.

It’s sometimes hard to eat crow, having to swallow your pride and apologize isn’t always easy. Apologies can be a tough pill to swallow but when you know you’re in the wrong it’s always the right thing to do, even if it hurts. But all too often those who are in the wrong do not make an attempt to apologize until their remarks are brought to the attention of others and only when the perpetrator receives a massive backlash over the comments or actions they made. Only then will they relent on their unpopular opinion and apologize. However the damage is already done, you cannot unsay something. And when you say what you mean, you have to stick by your words, and if you can’t, don’t say them in the first place.

People speak their mind and that is a great thing that needs to be supported and encouraged. Also if it’s how you truly feel you should never relent, even if it means you will lose. Just know that you can lose. Lose friends, lose family, lose your job. It can happen, but it should not take these events to see the wrong in your ways of thought. Feel free to say the unpopular things, maybe you are at the forefront of a beneficial yet revolutionary movement that others have yet to catch on to. Or maybe your view is the right one at the wrong time.

Often times when people find out that they hold an incredibly loathed view point they’ll back step their initial stance and apologize for offending they party’s they are saying offensive things to. A true apology is one of regret and remorse and one that is followed by actions that are conducive to their new way of thinking. Empty apologies without those actions are void of feelings, void of character, void of empathy and have no real meaning. They’re empty words masquerading as an apology. No one benefits, the perpetrator feels forced to do it feelings unchanged and the victims feels that there was no sympathy. But yet you both have to except the results. You can only hope in the future that those who are in the wrong, be it either side, but usually it’s the side apologizing, learn from their mistakes and hopefully they don’t make the same ones in the future.

Thank you very much for taking the time to read our post. If you like what you read, or even if you don’t, we would love to hear from you. Please join our email list here. Or if you want to comment on this article, or write your own in our Forum. Please sign in here and if you are new to the site you can register here. This website is not intended to be a blog. We want it to be a place to help others grow and learn from mistakes and the Forum is where that begins. Please tell us your stories.

August 31, 2018July 2, 2019

Corporate Panhandling (Blowing It Scenario #142).

Supporting Charities Is A Noble And Worthy Gesture. However, Do You Ever Question Why Corporations Panhandle For Your Money When You Go To Purchase Your Items At Checkout?

Everywhere you shop now, as you pay for your groceries or whatever you’re currently shopping for, the checkout clerk will always asks you if you would like to donate your change or some other dollar denomination to this cause or that cause. It’s usually a very good charity that you’d want to support. And you are either forced to feel very uncomfortable, bordering on horrible for saying no or you give them money every single time you have to purchase something. They’ll use a just cause, like helping children or muscular dystrophy, to get your support. They’ll say, “Hey, would you to support children’s hospitals this afternoon.” And you’ll think absolutely, what a great thing you guys are doing collecting money for them. But are we so lazy or neglectful that we can’t choose charities on our own to support? Or is there a reason behind the scenes that these companies now panhandle for extra money? Could it be that they take your kind gesture of donation bundle it with all other helpful soul’s money and then donate it on behalf of the corporation? Offsetting cost and creating a massive tax write-off for the corporation. Could that possibly be why they ask for this money in the first place? Even your favorite websites do it now. Social media has set up a really easy way to donate and let individuals choose the cause and use social influence to ask for donations.

I love to believe in altruism. That everyone that supports those in need of help, or individuals who volunteer, or donate to charity do it for completely selflessness reasons. Knowing your contribution is helping another is a wonderful feeling. And we should never balk at the idea of lending a helping hand. This is not an article to say don’t give to charity, and if you find the easiest way to do so is at your grocery store when buying your groceries or while checking friends post your favorite social media, than by all means continue to do so.

What I’m advocating is we should all do our research when supporting any cause to see where that money is going and that it’s getting to the right people, those who you are actively trying to support. And you’re not just padding the pockets of wealthy corporations and their rich executives who are giving themselves inflated salaries in the name of nonprofit, and then in turn writing off taxes as charitable donations made on behalf of them. Also is it too much to ask to shop without feeling obligated to hand out more money at the end of your shopping experience? When we want to donate, we will donate we shouldn’t need the local checkout person to tell us to do so.

Thank you very much for taking the time to read our post. If you like what you read, or even if you don’t, we would love to hear from you. Please join our email list here. Or if you want to comment on this article, or write your own in our Forum. Please sign in here and if you are new to the site you can register here. This website is not intended to be a blog. We want it to be a place to help others grow and learn from mistakes and the Forum is where that begins. Please tell us your stories.

August 30, 2018July 2, 2019

Zero Leverage (Blowing it Scenario #141).

You Can’t Expect To Change An Outcome Or Lift A Heavy Load Without Leverage.

A recent strike of the operators union in my home state has shut down a lot of construction. While it was going on, I overheard a construction worker say he doesn’t imagine it will last long. He assumed when the operators bills come due they’ll need to accept what they get and go back to work. He believed that the fact that they have house payments, car payments, credit card payments, etc. that they wouldn’t be able to hold out long to get what they truly want. And that got me thinking; sadly, that is the way of life for most people.

When we’re leveraged to the hilt with debt we have absolutely zero leverage everywhere else in life to challenge the status quo. Maybe our economy was designed that way, to give workers just enough to get by, and stay somewhat content. Employers don’t want employees trying to rock the boat or make any changes that may benefit the worker but cost the employer. So the more debt you acquire the better it is for the employer. You will do anything and everything to keep that job. Never strike, never rise up against them, never ask for anything you think is beyond what you deserve. And since you have settled, the likelihood of you asking for more is slim to none and employers know this. It’s why some employers want your financial history statement before you start work. So employers will encourage you to buy that house buy that car on credit. They will tell you that you will do so well under the employ; that you deserve to treat yourself now because you’ll be able to afford it later. Than when you want change you’ll be heavily under their thumb.

A life without debt gives you leverage, wealth gives you leverage, the more skills you acquire gives you leverage. If you are stuck in a job that you feel you can’t get out of, learn more skills. Make yourself unexpendable so you have leverage to negotiate more within that system. Within any system, be it a relationship, work or personal. Learn new skills in order to completely control the paradigm or leave that rat race behind. Start a business, be your own boss. Stay out of personal debt. Give yourself true leverage, only then will you begin to move heaven and earth to get to where you truly want to be.

Thank you very much for taking the time to read our post. If you like what you read, or even if you don’t, we would love to hear from you. Please join our email list here. Or if you want to comment on this article, or write your own in our Forum. Please sign in here and if you are new to the site you can register here. This website is not intended to be a blog. We want it to be a place to help others grow and learn from mistakes and the Forum is where that begins. Please tell us your stories.

August 29, 2018March 21, 2020

Withholding Life Saving Information (Blowing It Scenario #140).

Countries And Corporation Withhold Life Saving Information And Drugs Usually In The Name Of Finance.

A report came out that China has been with holding samples of the bird flu. It is a influenza bug that has the potential of killing a lot of people, if or when it makes the transfer from human to human. This is valuable research and an illness that all countries should be working towards suppressing. Never should we let our differences get in the way of creating systems of collaboration to help out the greater good of humanity.

I hope this withholding is for financial reasons and not some far more nefarious reason. Although withholding drugs and life saving treatment in the name of the all mighty dollar is quite nefarious. And drug companies, even hospitals do it all the time. It seems unconscionable, why would anyone make such a heinous decision? I guess in the some people eyes sometimes money is more important than saving lives. It happens often, especially when they don’t have the finances for it.

On the other hand it is a service and we do need to pay our fair share for such a service. It is how these services are produced in the first place. But massive inflation of a service just to pad the pockets at the expense of the many is inconceivable. As is withholding research of a potentially deadly strain of virus, so only a few will have access to its life saving vaccine. This is a counter intuitive approach. With limited supply, spread becomes easier and faster and it will still come beating down the doorstep of even those who have received the treatment. It may not get them, but it will come close to home if it spreads. So why not just work together.

Thank you very much for taking the time to read our post. If you like what you read, or even if you don’t, we would love to hear from you. Please join our email list here. Or if you want to comment on this article, or write your own in our Forum. Please sign in here and if you are new to the site you can register here. This website is not intended to be a blog. We want it to be a place to help others grow and learn from mistakes and the Forum is where that begins. Please tell us your stories.

August 28, 2018July 2, 2019

Youthful Premature Maturity (Blowing It Scenario #139).

Kids Are Growing Up And Using Adult Themes Far Earlier Than Ever Before And It’s Not A Good Thing.

I recently read an article where a young boy of nine years old came out to his classmates as gay. He then received everything but support from his class. Children can also be very cruel when they lack understanding and have no remorse. This boy of nine was than ridiculed to the point of suicide. I’ll say it again, only nine years old. It’s incredibly tragic and I feel it’s avoidable.

Maybe it’s just me but I think both sexual orientation and suicide are topics that no nine year should approach that young, and if they do, guide them away from it. I had no idea what gay or straight was when I was that age. And that’s how it should be. Kids should not at all be discussing their own sexual orientation that young. It’s far too heavy of a burden for a child. I get that we all are attracted to others starting at a very young age and sometimes that attraction is to those of the same sex. But it doesn’t make sense to voice it at that age when you are still many years away from seeking a partner. That goes for straight kids as well.

Kids are doing terrible things far before their maturity is there to really know right from wrong. And it’s all due to the information input they are receiving. It’s tragic that a child feels they can’t simply be a child that they need to take on heavier issues. The mother in the case of the boy did what every mother should do, love your child unconditionally. But I feel maybe if the child was better prepared for the cruel outside world that doesn’t love like a mother. He may have not approached such a subject with his peers quite yet. He would have waited for the right time. And yes there is a right time and it’s not nine. You may know then but you are not ready then.

And if you believe that nine is an appropriate age to take on adult themes, than maybe you’ll agree we should also allow nine year olds to have adult responsibilities like drive, vote, smoke, enroll in the military, drink alcohol to their hearts content, work a 40 year hour workweek. But that’s not the case because there are safe guards to protect children and we shouldn’t stop at just government mandates. Your home should always the first and main safe guard to protect children even if that means it’s not what they want to hear.

Thank you very much for taking the time to read our post. If you like what you read, or even if you don’t, we would love to hear from you. Please join our email list here. Or if you want to comment on this article, or write your own in our Forum. Please sign in here and if you are new to the site you can register here. This website is not intended to be a blog. We want it to be a place to help others grow and learn from mistakes and the Forum is where that begins. Please tell us your stories.

August 28, 2018July 2, 2019

Illogicality (Blowing It Scenario #138)

Be Logical In All Your Reasoning. But Be Unreasonable In Your Ambitious Pursuits. It’s Only Logical.

What’s wrong with speaking our truths simply, succinctly, and logically? We need to use logic to not only solve problems but to convey what we are doing and why we are doing it. It is not logical to blindly believe in something after history, science, and evolution have proven it to be wrong. Logic is taking all the seemingly random pieces of the puzzle and systematically putting them together to a conceptually sound point. Than relaying that information to the world at large.

It is illogical to reward bad behavior. If a child is hurting there sibling you do not reward them with candy. If an adult is habitually damaging their body or their life with no repentance or work towards improvement you don’t reward them with free financial benefits or replacement parts they have already damaged. If someone can’t maintain their own home, you don’t go and buy them a new house, it’s simply not logical. It is illogical to add complexity to simplicity. If you can get somewhere in life or in geographical terms in two moves, why would you take twelve to get there? It’s wasteful and illogical. Unless you’re doing it to take the scenic route or for the pure enjoyment of the added effort.

Logic is the fabric of our universe, everything works in tandem with explainable laws. If it’s not a law, than it’s theory. And in theory we need to be illogical at times to reach a far reaching conclusion. Because that which may seem logical to us at one point could be upended by new illogical information that in time is essentially far more logical. You have to sometimes be the judge of what makes most sense to you. The same goes with starting a new venture or that of ambitious pursuits. Logic would say play it safe, while risk would be illogical. But that is the time best suited for illogicality. We must take risk from time to time to build our resolve, to grow and improve. So use logic often but also know when it’s time to take risk.

Thank you very much for taking the time to read our post. If you like what you read, or even if you don’t, we would love to hear from you. Please join our email list here. Or if you want to comment on this article, or write your own in our Forum. Please sign in here and if you are new to the site you can register here. This website is not intended to be a blog. We want it to be a place to help others grow and learn from mistakes and the Forum is where that begins. Please tell us your stories.

August 27, 2018July 2, 2019

Sore Losers (Blowing It Scenario #137).

We All Love To Win, And For Most Of Us That Comes With A Heavy Disdain For Losing. But There Is An Appropriate Way To Win, As Well As An Appropriate Way To Lose.

As the saying goes; show me someone who loves to lose and I’ll show you a loser. That can tend to be an over-generalization of tough pill to swallow. No one enjoys losing but how we handle it is the true mark of a winner or loser. This is not something that is taught very often. Be gratuitous both in victory and in defeat.

For most of my life I thought losing was a disgraceful representation of the fact that I did not do my best in that particuar endeavour. Something to incessantly ruminate over and to continuously berate one’s self as well as sometimes that of your opposition. It’s a loser pity party to blame those around you or beat yourself up over the loss. You do have to take full accountability of your actions and the loss. But beating yourself up over it and not looking for ways to improve is a true loss.

Losing is simply just a lesson on ways to improve. It does not mean you didn’t try your hardest or do the best you could possibly do. Sometimes you are just outplayed by your opponent and that is a good thing. It means you still have a lot of room to grow, room to improve. It doesn’t always come down to not doing your best, your best may not be good enough in that moment. And in that moment thank your competitor for giving you a gift, the gift of discovery. You now have a new blueprint on finding ways to improve. Maybe you didn’t put in the amount of time and practice you competition did. Maybe you don’t communicate with your team or you’re just not as in sync as your opponents were. There are always ways to improve. Thank your competition in the midst of defeat for showing you those new methods.

Recently at a “Madden” gaming tournament in Jacksonville Florida a lone gun man who had earlier been eliminated from the tournament. Took losing to the ultimate extremes by channeling his aggression for both the loss and I’m sure for life in general. In to attacking and killing fellow players along with himself. This is truly a disgusting display on every level, not just of how not to lose but how not to live life. Our hearts go out to the victims of this tragedy. It’s a lesson that we can all do more to improve. We all lose when tragedies like this strike. Now that we have lost the question remains how will we use this loss to be better in the future?