google-site-verification: google2a63d702a01151e0.html

Annoyance Or Disdain For That Which You Want To Achieve. Avoiding Blowing #246


You Can Not Hold The Opposing Views Of Wanting To Achieve Something. And Then At The Same Time Have An Annoyance Or Disdain For That Same Thing.

Annoyance Or Disdain

We may not know we do it. You have to take close examination of yourself to truly see it. But every time we struggle in an area, there, bright as day you’ll see it. If we look hard enough we find annoyance or disdain for that something. And although we want it, we’ll never achieve it if we don’t correct and solve our underlying issues with it.

Take money for instance we all want more of it. But if we don’t have it, you can be assured we harbor some resentment towards it somewhere in our thoughts. Maybe it was never there when we needed it most. Maybe it caused conflict somewhere in our lives. Possibly it was the cause for your divorce or your parents divorce. The conflict we have with it needs resolving in order to get that which we want.

Do you struggle in marketing or sales? How do you feel when someone tries to sell you something. Do you look upon them with scorn? Or do you bask in the glow of there talent for persuasion?

Do you see marketing as an annoyance? An interruption to your work or enjoyment? Or do you see it as a creative art form that is so alluring and pleasing? One that needs celebrating as much as the Mona Lisa. And do you know why the Mona Lisa is one of the most famous art pieces in the world? Because of masterful marketing. For anyone who has ever blessed their eyes upon it, knows that it just might be the smallest painting throughout the entire Louvre. Yet millions of people every year flock to the museum in Paris to catch a glimpse. That is because of great marketing that has gone viral to the people. When it’s that good the guest become the evangelist over time.

But it first takes that brilliant mind that wants to help people make the best possible decision. So they market what that is to us with heart. Yet some may see marketing as an interruption. Maybe that goes back to childhood when commercials interrupted your favorite show. So you now learned over time to look at it as a nuisance, one to avoid at all cost. Then one day you want to market a product or brand that you love and feel it will help other people. But your marketing is complete garbage because you have harbored that disdain for so many years.

Look within yourself. If you are struggling in any area find that annoyance or disdain and turn the tables on it. Find a way to love the beauty in something. Look at it as an art form. Even making money can be a art form. You can even use your art to form a larger bank account. It all depends on how we look at it. Either way we can never be successful with views that oppose success.

Sunday Sadness, Sunday Blues. Avoiding Blowing It #245.

Sunday Sadness

Many Of Us Are Often Unpleasantly Hit By The Notion Of The Impending Work Week Ahead And Sunday Sadness Creeps In.

Sunday Sadness

This is a fascinating phenomenon and it happens to a lot of people. Society is structured in such a way that our routines over time signify Monday as the beginning of the week. Back to school, back to work, back to simply being somewhere you don’t necessarily want to be. It’s no wonder over so many years of doing this automatic routine a Sunday sadness begins to creep in near the end of the day.

After you enjoyed a delightful weekend where you had the freedom to do as you choose. As Sunday hits, you’re struck by the notion it’s all coming to an end soon. And you know as the fleeting hours tick by Sunday evening, the blues are soon to set in. And you start feeling that familiar Sunday sadness. Worrying about your impending week ahead, and that control of it might not be in your hands.

How To Not Blow It With Sunday Sadness.

Each time we subscribe to this conventionality and structure set for us in life. We reinforce the possibility of this expectation. And in order to hopefully make this not become a normal event. We have to shake up the status quo every once in awhile.

If you can’t shift your week schedule, shift how your weekends look. Make Sunday your happiest day of the week. Shift your mindset, meditate on how great your week ahead will be.

If you can, change up your schedule. Do so in a way that the concern for the week ahead always falls on a different day. So your body doesn’t develop addiction to this sadness. Diffuse it through osmosis by spreading out over different days.

Find pleasurable work so you always look forward to the week ahead. Maybe in that case a Friday sadness sets because you have to leave your work that brings you joy. But I highly doubt that happens. Humans will always love their freedom and autonomy even if we only get it for two days a week.

Never take a day off. Work on that which you enjoy every single day of the week. Maybe even do it if you don’t always enjoy it. At least you’ll be building that mental strength against the desire to not doing something and the sadness that sets in because of it. Today is Sunday and I already feel better for writing these words. Maybe tomorrow I’ll treat myself with more.

Shoulding On People. Avoiding Blowing It #242


Stop Shoulding On Yourself And Everyone Around You And Just Do The Should.

I am very guilty of this. Many times through out my writing I suggest what people should do. We should all over others but mostly we should all over ourselves. It happens far too much. Hell this article is a should of not shoulding.

The point being that should is an implied try, not a firm commitment of anything. It’s simply a think about doing something. Maybe in a different way then what your you are currently doing. But you’re not really required to do that new something.

That’s why shoulding on ourselves is so dangerous. We know we need a change so we’ll say to ourselves we should make that change. But since we don’t have a firm commitment to it, we’ll except the should as yet another postponement to get around to eventually.

I think the definition of should could be, kind of wanting to something but not really and if you can find an excuse to avoid it you most like will.

That’s why when we find ourselves saying we should do something. We need to immediately drop what we’re doing and take the tiniest action towards that goal. This way we start to clean up the mess should has left all over our lives. If you find yourself saying, “I should learn to play the guitar.” You have 5 seconds to go find a guitar and strum some chords. If you say, “I should write that novel.” You have 5 seconds to find the nearest piece of paper and write the first sentence.


Use the word should as the spring board of action. Instead of the crutch to inaction. If we know we should do something just do it. Don’t justify putting it off any longer with the language we choose to use. Should is not eventually, it is now. Do it now.

Hiding Our Flaws. Avoiding Blowing It #238.


Say It, Show It, Love It. Never Hide From Your Flaws. They Make You Uniquely You.

Trying to be perfect all the time is an unnecessary stress that causes anxiety. It’s a mental health issue. How wonderful would it be if we were all a little more excepting of ourselves, flaws and all? If you think you have a flaw in some area, immerse yourself in exposing that area and banishing that concern.

Poor writer? start a blog. I did. Think you’re not gorgeous without make up. Go without it till your comfortable. Worried about flaws on your body take sexy photos, get naked more often. Go to a nude beach or public nude event where no one knows you or cares about your any of your “flaws.” A place where they’re exposing all of theirs as well. Chances are you’re the only person that sees it as a flaw. You can be liberated for your fears and worries. Character flaw? Change it if it’s problematic to others, if not, accept it. It’s part of you.


Some things you can change but it’s far more healthy to simply enjoy what you have. Sometimes you just have to let your freak flag fly loud and proud. Remember to not intrude on others when you do. Someone somewhere will always be offended by one thing or another. So if you come across those steer clear and find more supportive groups. Just enjoy your gifts no matter how quirky or different to some they might be. Be grateful for them.

Not Putting Your Best Foot Forward. Avoiding Failure #237.

If You’re Going To Do Something Take Pride In That Effort And Put Your Best Foot Forward.

Over the weekend there was a heavyweight championship fight. It was a rematch of two fighters that had fought before. And in that first fight the heavy favorite was upset by the major underdog. Naturally there would be a rematch. And that’s exactly what took place this last weekend. However the underdog did not take pride in his work. He had reached the peak and now he was living on easy street. He did not put his best foot forward.

Best Foot Forward

Sure the years of toil in the gym afforded him the moment to bask in his accomplishments. But he knew he would have to defend the title. Since it was already a given that there would be this rematch. And he would make another windfall of money. Rather then put his best foot forward he instead chose to party with friends, over eat when he was already obese to begin with, adding an extra 15 pounds. I will say his strength and stamina at nearly 300 lbs is incredible. But he didn’t take it serious. He even admitted he under trained.

Why work to stay on top when you know the inevitable outcome? Maybe he thought he would his skills would carry him without improvements. Or maybe he knew he was the underdog and embraced it. The match did go to decision so he did go the distance with the champion. But when you show up out of shape you do a disservice to yourself and those who pay to see you perform at your best. That is not your best.

Now it’s set for a tie breaker match. And I’m sure he’ll work to improve to show he’s worthy of a third bout but why even go down that road when he clearly didn’t take it serious in the second. Why take him serious when he doesn’t do the same for himself? And that is exactly what happens when you don’t put your best foot forward. People move on from you and from your work. And when you reach that point it’s time to select new challengers and new challenges. Ones where you can invest yourself fully into and be at your best. Why get in a cycle of the same thing? Move on and move upward.

Not Taking Into Account Everyone Is Different. Avoiding Failure #235

Everyone Is Different

Everyone Is Different In So Many Ways We Need To Avoid The One Size Fits All Solutions.

Everyone is different. Different mental wiring, different body compositions, complexions, biome, genetic make up. No two people are exactly alike. So why do we try to solve problems like everyone is the same?

Self Help

The self help guru peddling his self help porn will say do these affirmations just think it, wish it, want it, and achieve it. Which most definitely works for some. But for some it creates animosity to the life they live and if you destroy the life you have in chase of what you think you want. Only to find you were happiest where you were then you failed yourself because you didn’t truly know yourself. Just because you want something doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll get it.

Body Dependence

A non drinker will say to the alcoholic just stop drinking. I can, why can’t you? We take in no account that the physiology of the two could be drastically different. While one created a dependence the other abstained and their bodies went to work in different directions. Not only the physiology but the brain wiring is completely different as well.

It’s also why no diet has the same exact effect on each person that tries it. While some may get in the best shape of their life others may feel ill and depleted.


People will teach high price classes and use the success stories of a few to show that it works. They never display the people who took the class did everything exactly how it was taught and still didn’t manage to find success. If the system worked for some it’s destined to work for all right? But It’s because everyone is so different that even hidden in the subtleties of our actions hides the micro adjustments that some make and others do not. Actions that could never be perfectly duplicated.


Everyone Is Different
Photo by Clarisse Meyer on Unsplash

It’s why two people walking the exact same path can see the road so vastly different. One sees a miserable hellscape, an arduous journey through perilous terrain. While the other sees a beautiful sunshiny trail through epic luscious foliage with birds chirping and happy honey bees buzzing. Not only is everyone’s environment different, the way everyone views that environment is different as well. It’s just difficult to say do this and you will achieve that.

Bill Gates, Elon Musk, Steve Jobs. These archetypes of massive success are wired differently then the rest. And that’s okay. Each one of them is drastically different from the other in many ways too. Maybe you’re not a titan of industry and that’s alright. But maybe you want to be that’s okay too. Hopefully you have the correct make up for it.

Embrace The Real You.

Sometimes we try as we might and our outcomes are just different from the rest. Or what we feel the rest achieved along that same path. But rather than be upset or jealous of others experiences or successes. Stop looking over your neighbors fence at there perfectly manicured lawn and just start doing whatever you want to yours. Plant a small forest, build some out buildings, add livestock. Make it exclusively yours with an individual touch only you could derive.

Just know that everyone’s journey and experience in life is unique. Rather then dwell on what you don’t have. Embrace who you truly are, find your individual strengths. Always be in search of what makes you you. Self reflect. It’s better to know oneself and cultivate that, then spend a lifetime chasing someone else’s ideal.

Justifiable Inaction. Avoiding Failure #234

Justifiable Inaction

A Lack Of Actions Assisted By Excuses. Avoid Justifiable Inaction.

Essentially it’s just us making excuses to not do something. Absence of action can never truly be justified. Accountability will override justifiable inaction every time. Easy is making excuses not to do something. I could not for the life of me find anything to write about today. Sometimes you just can’t find fault in things. It would have been easy to say since I can’t find anything to discuss I’ll do nothing at all and go do absolutely nothing. My answer was in the possibility of inaction. Always search for answers to combat listlessness.

Being committed to a driven purpose can counter any notions of your desire for inaction. However when you have no mission you can easily flounder. Not only will you get comfortable and used to inaction but what little action you contribute will be vastly ineffective. Stay in motion and believe you are contributing and you soon will.

Another option, rather than toil away on a dead end. Would be to create new paths of action. If you can’t find an action to be accomplished in your current environment change the paradigm. If I couldn’t find anything to write about I could work on upgrading the website or work on another project all together. I could read educational material to build a mental model for future discussions.

There is an absolute endless supply of possibilities one can occupy their time with. Choose the ones that will push you forward and benefit others in the process. Laying around doing nothing is an activity but not one of any action or any benefit. Add creative thought or meditation and sitting around becomes a positive. No lack of action is quite justifiable.

Elevated Stress Levels. Avoiding Failure #233.


When Tempers Increase And Stress Levels Rise. That’s The Time To Become The Calm. Decrease And Defuse Rather Than Elevate With It.

Photo by Tim Goedhart on Unsplash

Breathe deep for this will being a trying exercise of patience. But breath work can be the strongest weapon against the rise of stress. Sometimes the hardest thing in a escalated field of this negative energy can be the come down. More often then not we tend to continue the escalation and pass it on to others who might in turn pass it on to even more. And so the chain will grow unless you decide to not give into that energy and be the strength and calm healing energy that will end the cycle and restore peaceful homeostasis to your environment.

It is not always accomplished in the environment you are currently in either. Sometimes we just need to step away, find solitude, and count our blessing. To find our happy place of gratitude. And most importantly breathe deep. If we can’t step away, focus on your breathing. Count long inhales and longer exhales.

Escape within your mind to a peaceful place. And radiate that inner world to your outer world. And watch as the wave of calm energy overtakes that which was once a heightened sense of anger fear frustration and stress wash away from others as well as yourself. The more you stay in this state the easier it will become to languish in it for longer periods of time. To the point you begin to except all stressful situations and know that you not only have the tools to keep yourself in that peaceful state but you can create a space that draws others into calm as well.

Lastly if you know a topic is triggering to you or a situation is going to increase stress related chemicals throughout your body. Avoid those topics and situations. If you find yourself up in arms about certain subjects don’t broach those subjects. Just learn to keep the peace and stay at peace. You’ll thank yourself and so will everyone else around you. You’ll become others prozac.

Unwillingness To Humble Yourself In Life’s Defeats. Avoiding Failure #232.

Humble Yourself

When Life Knocks You Down, Humble Yourself. Than Get Back Either Stronger Or In A Different Capacity.

You could say Michael Jordan would never humble himself. He was the consummate champion. It would take off his winning edge. Sure that’s true when your the best. But he had to humble himself when he played baseball. He realized he would never be as great as he was in basketball and came back to the sport where he needn’t be humbled again until the end of his playing days.

When he was with the Wizards, as the sun was setting on his illustrious career he was humbled again then as well. Though I’m sure he would never admit it. But he came back and continued his competitive spirit in a different capacity. He purchased a basketball team. And the work will never be complete with that endeavor. Businesses can last much longer then the body can hold up in some cases.

Businesses, relationships, and ideas all end too. And in those instances you will need to humble yourself and pivot to a role better suited. Be it a different business, relationship, or idea all together. Or simply changing the structure of the current model you are in.

We see it in sports all the time. Its a perfect model of this in action. As a player ages and their body can no longer keep up with what their mind thinks they’re capable of. Or they refuse to adapt, as their environment changes. They will quickly be left behind without change. But those who humble themselves and assimilate into a team role they may not always think suits their talent. Will often thrive when they take out their ego and play in that new capacity.

Humble Yourself
Photo by Alex Loup on Unsplash

How To Not Blow It Solution.

So if you find that you may have reached your peak, first work harder to make sure you have hit that limit. And if you find you can go no further. Humble yourself, eat a slice of that pie. Reexamine your strengths, and plan out a new strategy of attack. Then implement it with fierce dedication until success is again achieved.

Passive Action. Avoiding Failure #231.

passive action

People Want Passive Income, But Income Takes Action To Generate. And Passive Action Is An Oxymoron.

Two words that fundamentally do not go together are passive action. Some things definitely take more action than others. But no matter what you do you have to put in work consistently. While there are definitely examples of work becoming more passive after massive effort. The fact remains if they stay passive they will begin the process of atrophy. Than wither and decay and eventually die.

And that is the case with all things passive. They eventually die. If you don’t continually put in effort in some way you are signing that death certificate. Be it in business or relationships or housing or your body. There can never be full passivity. So why even strive for it?

I believe this one fact is why we have such catastrophic failures in our marriages today. People often quickly switch to a passive approach to the relationship as soon as those marriage papers are signed. When the real work is supposed to be just beginning.

Same goes for the wantreprenuer businesses of today the real work begins after the idea, after it’s the business is setup. Once the clients begin coming in. That’s the time to work even harder. Its simply another relationship to cultivate and you don’t want to let it atrophy.

As a matter a fact everything we do is a relationship to something. You have a personal relationship to your body, mind, spirit, and an external relationship to the outside world around you. To people, to money, to experiences. And you can not be passive about any of it.

Passive action
Photo by Simon Fitall on Unsplash

Progress is what the goal should be. Even when you reach that mountain top. Know that passive action didn’t get you there. Celebrate the victory but know you still need to get to the bottom alive and falling a sleep while you sled down is simply not an option. Well it is an option but good luck with that. That is a passive approach. The descent is technical and demanding it takes even more work sometimes and when you reach safety, plan for the next peak. So instead of striving to reach passivity. Strive to have the strength to except more challenges into your life. And know with each one you’ll become stronger while you fly past the passive observers.